Afraid your honey is pulling a "Tiger"? ... and other attempted sales gone hilariously wrong

"First, let me give you a tip for free: If you're so convinced your partner is cheating on you that you're moved to indulge in technology-assisted snooping, unless you are living in a madcap romantic comedy, you are probably not going to learn that his strange behavior is part of an elaborate engagement plan and/or a plot to demonstrate how much you mean to him. So "peace of mind" might be a bit of a lofty goal here. A more realistic aim would be "finding out the truth you already basically knew in a way that makes you feel like a huge jerk, at least if you have a soul." But if you're still interested, let's take a look at the totally not stalky suggestions for spying on the person you ostensibly trust most in the world."

http://salon.com/life/broadsheet/feature/2009/12/08/spying_partner/index.html

I love all things that denigrate the complete unreality of romantic comedy movies, and this article is a double-whammy for *also* denigrating the weirdness that is our obsession with celebrity sexuality. Thank you Broadsheet.

As Dan Savage would say, if you're really concerned enough to employ such privacy invading tactics to snoop on your man, consider that you might need to DTMFA. Oh, and then go get some counseling.

Other product pitches gone hilariously wrong:

"WHAT MIGHT YOU HAVE IN COMMON WITH OPRAH WINFREY AND CAROLINE KENNEDY?

IF YOU ANSWERED JIGGLY ARMS FLABuLESSU.com HAS THE SOLUTION

What could I possibly have in common with successful women? Oh, right: Arm fat. Fuck you. Wait! This one comes illustrated, with a helpful red arrow:"

and also:

"Greetings,

I found your address on the web, and thought you might be interested in purchasing an emailing list of Freemasons…"

Both from jezebel

one great tip for your marriage

I don't usually like to link to other blog posts about articles, but in this case one of my favorite blogs extrapolated a gem from a NYT article about the Obamas' marriage that I thought was spot-on:

" Just as one's accomplishments shouldn't be limited by birth, marriage isn't about who you are, it's about what you do."

http://www.salon.com/life/broadsheet/feature/2009/10/29/obama_marriage/index.html

People spend a lot of time considering who they are, how they're defined, and trying to define themselves in a lot of different ways. But when it comes to relationships, your actions and choices are what matters, and this is how to make or break a marriage.

The Obamas actually paint a pretty unglamorous portrait of their marriage, but it works because they're both committed to making the choices that are necessary to keep it together. What a great, unselfish example of commitment!

Degrees of Success: Automating Finances

Remi Sethi has a great chart laying out what fully automated finances would look like.

While I really aspire to reach that level of automation, I'm really happy with a *nearly* automated system that's been about a year in the making.

What is Automated

• income is direct-deposited into our checking account, monthly for me and weekly for the hubby
• my retirement contributions (15%) are automatically deducted from my check before I ever see it
• savings is scheduled once a month from my check (12%) and once a week from hubby's check (7%)
• started a Roth IRA for hubby with small monthly scheduled deposit, will ramp up when the truck is paid off
• most of the bills are automatically paid: electric, gas, cell, student loan, child support, truck loan
• credit cards are automatically paid in full at the beginning of the month

What is Not Automated

• some bills are manually entered into billpay because the amounts change from month-to-month or they are not delivered electronically: cable, water, insurance, mortgage
• union dues for the hubby are paid by mailing a physical check and are due monthly
• church tithes are paid with a physical check each week

Our savings aren't broken out into several sub-goals yet. There are currently two piles, emergency savings (untouchable) and regular savings (spendable). The goals I'd like to set up as separate funds are: next car, gifts, and home improvement. I'll try and set those up in my Ing account soon and report back with the math for setting those goals.

Julie Pickett-Hall

You also might be interested in:

- another post from Remi on how to set up sub-goal accounts using your Ing account

- comment or email me to get a $25 bonus when you sign up a new Ing account

Sick Leave, and Why I Fail to Use the Closet

Wow, I was really sick last week and missed a few days of work. Since I'm mostly working on my wardrobe challenge, this didn't leave me much to blog about (since I wasn't dressing for anything other than sleeping on the couch).

The break from the challenge was nice, and it's also made me think that maybe I'm beyond the big wins at this point. My work clothes fit in the closet and I've sorted and culled dramatically. I'm also starting to recycle clothes that I've already posted about!

My main challenge right now is keeping my clothes hanging in the closet. I consistently fail to hang my clothes back up every night, until I have a large pile of clothes in a basket at the foot of the bed. This is because I have a bad bed-time routine.

I pile my clothes up at the end of the night because I've gotten distracted by something or maybe even fallen asleep on the couch while watching tv or reading. So by the time I go to bed, I rush to the bathroom, brush my teeth, and then pile up my clothes and crawl into bed. I don't want to turn on the light or mess with the closet because I don't want to wake up the hubby, who goes to bed early.

By the time I'm up in the morning, I'm rushed to get to work and leave the pile where it was last night with it's additional layer of yesterday's clothes on top.

I don't really have a good solution to this at the moment, but I'll think it over and look for a usable alternative. Any suggestions?

wardrobe challenge weekend update

I really have to share about this weekend and the challenge. On Saturday morning I took *4* bags of clothes and a box of jeans to the mission store in town. To think that I had so many clothes, much less ones I don't wear or like very much, was very inspiring. All of my work clothes now fit in the closet since I decided to attack my collection of pants that morning. I ended up keeping 3 jeans for work, 3 jeans for weekends, and only the nicest of my dress pants.

I did not manage to find any jackets to donate this weekend other than blazers from my work clothes, so I may have failed on that count :P

The woman at the mission store really liked a lot of the clothes I brought in, and gave me a good deal on the items I picked out while I was there: a cute grey wool cardigan, a butter-yellow wrap sweater that I loved, a flattering knee-length jean skirt, and a basic red long-sleeved tee. I also grabbed a few jeans for the hubby to wear to work.

I also finally received a blue cardigan I had ordered online with a coupon as well as the dark pink wrap-scarf that I was able to get free at the same time. I completely love them both and have been wearing them since. The scarf goes nicely with both of my coats, and the cardigan is lightweight and a great color. It's so nice to have things that I really like to wear! Now I just have to be careful to not get carried away and blow my clothes budget filling in wardrobe gaps.

Anniversary!

Yesterday was my first wedding anniversary with the Dear Hubby. We didn't end up having either of his kids for dinner (customary on Mondays), so we went out. The dinner wasn't actually all that great, but it was nice to do something together. Afterwards I went and helped paint a friend's nursery for a while, then went home where Hubby and I had some champagne and year-old frozen cake.

The cake wasn't that bad. The frosting still tastes good, but there was a metallic aftertaste to the whole concoction, probably from being frozen for a year.

An odd tradition, but worth it in the end if it gives us any amount of luck.

wardrobe challenge update 10/15/09

The wardrobe challenge is going so well! Tuesday night I went through the upstairs closet, brutally culling skirts and dresses. I babied a few of the printed skirts momentarily, thinking of possible ways to wear them... until I tried them on and they didn't fit. Duh, maybe I should have tried some of this stuff on years ago.

In the end I saved 2 black skirts: an A-line heavy velvety skirt good for church, and a suit-like skirt for work. How simple! They are now in my actual closet, ready for wearing instead of hiding upstairs. I packed everything else up in a bag, along with the first round of discarded shoes. Either Friday or Saturday morning I'll take the bag to the local mission. It has begun!

I was in such a mood that I gave away a nice winter coat to a friend who stopped by. I love the coat, but I have several and don't need it... so I gave it away right then and there. It felt fabulous.

I'm starting to think that my goal should be to have at least all work clothes (if not all clothes) hanging in my half of our bedroom closet. That's more than enough room for a work wardrobe. I've also inspired the Dear Hubby to cull his massive collection of t-shirts.

As for my outfitting the past few days:

Wednesday I really wanted to wear my vibrant pinkish trapeze top, but it's sleeveless so I had to find something to coordinate on top. I'd just worn my black cardigan the day before, so that was a no-go. In the end, I wore a blue pinstriped blazer that I don't feel great in, and should probably go in the giveaway pile. I also wore my tall dark jeans and blue ballet crocs for the rainy conditions. Not very flattering shoes, but invaluable in my walk to and from rehearsal in the drizzle. My red mary jane crocs are much better, and I should have just held off on the awesome top until I could coordinate it better a cardigan and shoes. Maybe the blue ballet crocs need a new home, as well.

Today turned out much better! I'm wearing a dark blue cable-knit sweater over a white collared polo. I started wearing this last year and it's a nice look. The sweater is lightweight and fitted. Also wearing my tall dark jeans (others are in the wash as we speak), my green wedges, and silver hoops. I've also refreshed my gunmetal silver nail-job, and it all works pretty nicely. I wish I had thought to grab my silver peace bracelet this morning.

All-in-all things are moving along. I'm figuring out that I should only keep the things I really love to wear... hopefully I have clothes left at the end!